By Junior Cabin Boy Gian Carlo Luigi della Stromboli

SAN FRANCISCO - The San Francisco Board of Supervisors today approved a plan to pursue development of the F-bomb, a devastating weapon of mass profanity that could prove to be a deterrent to a rumored U.S. invasion of the City. Controversial supervisor Chris Daly sponsored the resolution, calling it "a big fuck you" to President George W. Bush and what he said were "fucking Republican pricks" and "spineless Democratic pussies" in Congress.

The board voted 9-2 on the measure, which calls for the City to spend up to $10 million over the next two months on the F-bomb program. Once developed, F-bombs would be deployed at strategic locations around San Francisco, particularly along invasion routes that could be used by attacking U.S. forces. When detonated, an F-bomb unleashes a devastating stream of profanity that is capable of incapacitating anyone within a five-mile radius.

Tensions have been running high between the City and County of San Francisco and the U.S. government since the re-election of President George W. Bush in November.  Bush won only 15% of the popular vote in the City, with the rest of the electorate backing Democratic challenger John Kerry.

San Francisco late last month completed its defensive preparations in the event that the Bush Administration launches an invasion (see related story, "San Francisco lawmakers unveil civil-defense plans for second Bush term"). The City has placed explosive charges at the foot of both the Bay and Golden Gate bridges, and has also built a line of fortifications, dubbed the Harvey Milk Line, across the peninsula in the area of the Cow Palace.

The F-bomb program would complement these preparations. According to internal documents acquired by FogWatch.com, there are two possible routes the City could pursue in developing the weapon. The first type of device, known as a fission bomb, would take a digital audio recording of Daly speaking at a Board of Supervisors session and would divide it into separate profanity-laced segments that would be released when the bomb is detonated.

The second type of device, known as a fusion bomb, would create a far more powerful thermoprofanity explosion by fusing multiple Daly swear words into a single, devastating shock wave. A fusion F-bomb is believed to have the energy of 1,000 fission F-bombs.

In addition to its value as an invasion deterrent, the F-bomb program represents a positive development for the City, which has been at a loss for how to handle its most colorful of supervisors. "Channeling Daly's energy into this program is a real win-win situation for both sides," said a City Hall observer.

On his daily blog site (http://www.chrisdaly.org/), Daly said he was "really fucking excited" about the new program and expected it to "totally kick the shit" out of any invading federal force.

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San Francisco lawmakers unveil civil-defense plans for second Bush term